We decided to run to a nearby taco place for dinner, and while in the parking lot I noticed a sort of…flow to the other businesses.
It started at the Westend Tavern. Their eyes met across the crowded bar, and they knew (after a few shots and some nachos) that it was meant to be.
He decided that the best way to prove his undying love would be to run next door for a tattoo of her name…no, her FACE, emblazoned across his chest.
Of course, being a Springfieldian, she was of course enchanted. After a brief make-out session in the back of his Pinto, they set the date, and the preparations began.
First stop, flowers! Oh, it’s hydroponics? What the hell is that, even? Oh well. Give me a bouquet of pot leaves, that’ll do.
Next stop, the beauty shop! Gotta get those roots touched up, extensions adjusted and how about some color-blocking ala “Sons of Anarchy” hottie Gemma. And let’s get a trim for that mullet, boyo! You’re looking like a hippie!
They were getting a little impatient to consummate their undying love, and love was on their side this day. A zodiac wedding chapel? OMG you’re a Sagittarius? I’m an Aries! OHEMGEE!
And they do vehicle lettering and LED signing – does that mean a big, bright JEST MARIED sign on the back of the Pinto? I think it does!
Now for the reception…perfect! Food, drink and video gambling! Get the DJ from the wedding place and call the folks, we got us a shindig!
But really, all that tequila from Westend (see above) is starting to take its toll. Fortunately, the Bistro has that covered. Hair of the dog, and hangover cures!
Well, I think we all know how this story ends. A long, happy life together…oh, did she mention Tommy, the crazy ex…and Brenda, his baby mama? Kids? You never said you had kids! Well I was gunna, soon as you explain what Tommy’s saying about your daddy-brother!